*Habit Doesn't Die Easily* [--3rd Show--]
--------------------------------بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
When you were first joined as a legal husband and wife, your partner could do no wrong. They wooed and romanced you so well that you barely noticed their quirky little habits. But now, after few months or years of marriage, what was once a cute quirk has now turned into an irritating quirk.
Servants Of Allah!
Everyone wants to feel comfortable with the choices they make in life whether good or bad. However, repeating familiar behaviours can be harmful and destructive in a marital relationship, and the good news is that you can help your spouse overcome negative repetitive behaviour in your marriage. Yes. This remind me of some people's testimonies which will help in this:
*Testimony No 1:* "I'm someone who hate music the way i hate shaytan (devil). I married a sister who was found of listening to music. Infact, she enjoyed listening to music more than she enjoyed food. Our first week after marriage to me, was like a life in a community of dangerous animals. I used all the Qur'an verses and hadeeth i know which prohibit music, but it doesn't make any positive change. This bad behavior continued for like a month. I now resolved to use plan 🅱️ since the words of Allah (swt) did not give me a desired results. She love me so much and so deep. So, each time she played the music, i used to stand up and leave the house for her (even if it's in the middle of the night). She used to asked - *"where are you going to by this time?"* - my response used to be - *"I don't like music and i can't bear to stay with you while listening to music. I will come back home when you are done"*... Since she love me so much, she do not like me leaving the house. She used to off the music just to keep me by her side. Gradually, she stopped listening to music. Today, she hate seeing someone playing music anywhere she is... Alhamdulillah!"
*The Bitter Truth:*
*No 1:* Even if you separate with your wife or husband because he or she is having so so and so undesirable behaviors, definitely, the next person you will marry may have MORE undesirable behaviors (which maybe different from the one's of your ex) since you can't know everything about a man or woman before marriage.
*No 2:* If your spouse is having 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 undesirable behaviors and you insist that those undesirable behaviors should ALL vanish before you open eyes and close it, then, you will be a dreamer. Yes. It will be very difficult to achieve that.
We must remember that,
Even the laws in Islam came to us bit-by-bit. For instance, during jahileeyyah (before the prophethood of Muhammad - pbuh), People were drinking alcohol. So, if the prohibition came that people should stop drinking alcohol COMPLETELY, it will be difficult for them to practice Islam. So, the first prohibition for alcohol drinking was - *"Don't drink while you want to pray"* - and jahileeyyah people at that time used to drink few hours before swalah time.. Then, Allah (swt) revealed the final laws for prohibition of alcohol drinking, which is - *"Don't drink alcohol at all, for any reason"* - A verse in Surarul Baqarah and Suratul Maidah is prove for these... Allahu Akbar!
This is telling us that, it's not easy to change someone's behaviors within a tinkle of an eye. Yes. Some of your spouse's undesirable behaviors will go off completely, but it will take little time. So, don't worry. Just be patient.
After all,
Ibn Umar reported: The Prophet (pbuh) said, “The believer who mixes with people and is patient with their harm has a greater reward than the believer who does not mix with people, nor is patient with their harm.” 📚Source: Sunan Ibn Majah 4032 - Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani
TO BE CONTINUED....
Comments
Post a Comment