*Habit Doesn't Die Easily*[--1st Show--]
--------------------------------بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Do you have a spouse or partner who refuses to change, won’t listen to your advice, or continues to make poor decisions?
Your spouse’s bad behavior can make your life seem as though it’s falling apart. Your psyche is stretched to the limit, and you’re not sure how much longer you can survive if things don’t change.
Muslim Faithful!
All relationships have their fair share of ups and downs, and you need to work hand in hand with your partner to overcome adverse situations.
If we bargain for or insist on "immediate" changing our spouse's uncomfortable behaviors, then, such expectations can never be realizable because their behavior probably won't be changing significantly anytime soon. Yes. I have seen some couples who after fighting and quarrelling to change their spouse's bad behaviors and failed, resorted to adapting better workable means of achieving that, and after sometimes, their bad behaviors were replaced with the good ones. Change, although an inevitable component of life, is never easy.
Servants Of Allah!
If your partner has been unwilling to make changes in the past, it's possible that you didn't give enough time for change to occur or you may need to try a different approach. It's not easy trying to push someone into changed behavior. And the key to this battle is patience and understanding. Yes. It's not about being right or wrong but making sure everyone feels loved, respected, heard, cared for—all things we deserve from our partners.
Ibn Umar reported: The Prophet (pbuh) said, “The believer who mixes with people and is patient with their harm has a greater reward than the believer who does not mix with people, nor is patient with their harm.” 📚Source: Sunan Ibn Majah 4032 - Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani
Also, Allah (swt) say:
“Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full, without reckoning.” 📚(Az Zumar, 39:10)
Of course, some things should never be tolerated in a relationship for too long, like infidelity on the side of women, spouses refusal to establish obligatory swalah etc.. These behaviors should be addressed directly without delay or by ending the relationship (if that persist).
Now,
*Marriage and patience in Islam, story of Zainab ibn Muhammad:*
There is this story of Zainab bint Muhammad, the eldest daughter of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and Khadijah (ra). The story shows the importance of having a great Patience in Islam.
Abu al-‘As ibn Rabi’ was the husband of Zainab and was loved by Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) very much. One day Abu al-‘As ibn Rabi’ went to the Prophet (pbuh) before he had received his mission of Prophethood and said: “I want to marry your eldest daughter”. So the Prophet (pbuh) replied: “I must ask her first”. He went to Zainab and asked her: “Your cousin came to me and he wishes to marry you, do you accept him as your husband?” Her face turned red with bashfulness and she smiled.
So Zainab married him, the beginning of a great love story! They had two children; Ali and Omama. Then Muhammad ibn Abdullahi became a Prophet of Allah while Abu al-‘As ibn Rabi’ was away from Makkah. When he returned he saw Zainab had become a Muslim. When he first came back, his wife said “I have great news for you”. He stood up and left her. Zainab was surprised and followed him as she said, “My father became a Prophet (pbuh) and I have become a Muslim”.He replied, “Why didn’t you tell me first?” Hence a big problem began between the two; a problem of religion and belief.
She told him, “I wasn’t going to disbelieve in my father and his message, he is not a liar, and he is “The Honest and Trustworthy”. I’m not the only believer; my mother and....
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