*Habit Doesn't Die Easily*[--3rd Show--]
--------------------------------بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
The Prophet(pbuh) stood up and said, “O people, I declare that this man was a very good son-in-law, he never broke his promise, and neither did he tell lies. So if you accept, I will return his money back and let him go. If you refuse it’s your decision and I will not blame you for it.” The companions agreed, “We will give him his money”.
So the Prophet (pbuh) said to Zainab, “We have freed the one you have freed, O Zainab.” Then, he went to her and told her, …don’t let him get near you, he is prohibited for you.” She replied, “Sure, father, I’ll do as you say”.
She went in and told her husband, “O Abu Al’As, didn’t you miss us at all? Won’t you become a Muslim and stay with us?” But he refused. Abu Al’As then took the money and returned to Makkah.
Once he returned he stood up and announced, “O people, here is your money. Is there anything left?”
They replied, “No, Abu Al’As, there is nothing left, thanks a lot.” So Abu Al’As said, “I testify that there is no God but Allah, and Muhammad is His Messenger.” Then he went back to Madinah and ran to the Prophet as he said, “Dear Prophet, you freed me yesterday, and today I say that I testify there is no God but Allah and you are His Messenger.”
He asked the Prophet (pbuh), “Will you give me the permission to go back to Zainab?” The Prophet (pbuh) smiled and said, “Come with me”; he took him to Zainab’s house and knocked on her door. The Prophet (pbuh) said, “O Zainab, your husband came to me and asked if he can return to you”. Just like 20 years before, her face turned red with bashfulness and she smiled.
The sad thing was, a year after this incident, Zainab died. Abu Al’As shed hot tears because of her death and drove those who were around him to tears. The Messenger of Allah came with eyes full of tears and a heart full of sorrow. Zainab’s death reminded him of the death of his wife, Khadeejah. He told the women, who gathered around Zainab’s corpse, “Wash her three times and use camphor in the third wash.” He performed funeral prayers on her and followed her final resting place.
Abu Al’Ass returned to his children, Ali and Omama. Kissing them and wetting them with his tears, he remembered the face of his departed darling. Abu Al’Ass would cry so profusely that the people saw the Prophet (pbuh) himself weeping and calming him down. Abu Al’As would say, “By Allah, I can’t stand life anymore without Zainab”. He died one year after Zainab’s death.
Allahu Akbar!!!
Do we see that, even with religious differences, Zainab's patience with her husband have attracted one of the biggest bonus. Yes. Her husband reverted to Islam.
Brothers & Sisters!
Your relationship is a package deal. Regardless of how perfect they may have seemed initially, your spouse will always have some habits that bother you. Change sometimes doesn’t happen fast enough to suit us. Yes. Your beloved may be oblivious to your dissatisfaction. If he or she doesn’t realize the need to change something quickly, a loving spouse can gently ask for change using wisdom. Yes. Allah swt say:
ٱدْعُ إِلَىٰ سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِٱلْحِكْمَةِ وَٱلْمَوْعِظَةِ ٱلْحَسَنَةِۖ وَجَٰدِلْهُم بِٱلَّتِى هِىَ أَحْسَنُۚ
"Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is best..." 📚An-Nahl 16:125
Nagging, cajoling, and arguing, however, get us nowhere and can make us even more miserable.
In a relationship, it’s not about losing or winning arguments or fights but being mindful and choosing between matters that just need to blow over and issues that are worth tackling.
You need to evaluate if the problem at hand is worth arguing over. It’s natural for you and your partner not to agree on everything. Hence, sometimes, if it’s a minor or an inconsequential matter, it’s worth dropping.
Now,
*How To Handle A Difficult Husband Or Wife When it Comes to Change:*
TO BE CONTINUED
Allah alone knows best
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