Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage* *Episode 180* *SOCIAL MEDIA AND MARRIAGES

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*Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage*

*Episode 180*

*SOCIAL MEDIA AND MARRIAGES*

Every good if misused can be bad. No doubt social media has changed a lot of things in the past few decades. Yet it has caused more harm than good in today's life especially in marital homes. Marriages have been destroyed, people have lost their lives, careers have been destroyed etc. We will look at its role in breaking marriages. 

Husbands and social media 

1. Lots of men today are spoilt because of their engagement in these platforms. 

2. When they are home they are married to their phones, not their wife or family. 

3. Many men today engage in pornography because of social media. It exposes men to watching or seeing haram. 

4. It creates doubt in the minds of many wives. 

5. And it promotes zinā. 

Wives and social media. 

1. It exposes women to having affairs; such relationships always starts with hello and hi, then suddenly you are getting closer. 

2. It creates doubt in your spouses' mind. And he will never trust you. 

3. It diverts your focus from being a wife and mother to being a slay queen on social media. 

4. It leads to zinā of photos. When married women feel comfortable sharing their pictures. It is a serious problem. 

5. It makes you lazy, therefore home chores are left undone. 

6. Lastly, it makes some women so demanding, artificial and pompous. They always feel their husbands are not trying because they keep comparing themselves with other slay queens. 

All the above behaviours today are determinants that can change our marriages. If not addressed properly, one can destroy themselves unknowingly, by the time they realise it, it will be too late. 

To address these issues:

1. As a husband, lead by example. Avoid social media if necessary. If you claim you use it as a source of news and other information, then purity your intentions and use it appropriately. 

2. Staying too long on social media creates a lot of sparks in many marriages. So, time your self, and if you have nothing to hide, let your spouse know what exactly you do when you go online. 

3. Liking pictures of the opposite sex doesn't show a good behaviour. Lots of people don't know that when they like or comment on someone, other people who are on their friends' list can easily see it. So this leads to many embarrassing moments. As a married person, it is not befitting for you to be liking pictures or videos posted by the opposite sex especially strangers. 

4. Pornography destroys your marriage. And by the way, according to new york times, 80% of what you see in pornography movies are not real, they are doctored by directors and editors. So when you watch porn you expect that your spouse can give you that level of satisfaction. It is not possible. And it makes you lose your mind. So Boycott pornography if you want your marriage to be blessed.

5. As a wife social media is not good for you, because of your security, marriage, and children. If you can, avoid social media. 

6. Many husbands banned their wives from using social media, i don't blame them, because they live in peace now. But note that, if your husband bans you from using and you use it anyways, then it is haram for you. It is as good as going outside without your husband's permission. Today social media is like an open street. 

7. As a wife and mother, your children follow every step you take, spending hours on social media is not good for you and your children. Use it wisely. 

8. If you must use it as a married woman, i advise you to create a fake account, male, with male picture. So that men don't disturb you. I believe many people use it as a source of learning, hence you can fake your identity in order to remain anonymous. 

May Almighty Allāh (Sub-haanahu wata'aala) protect us from the crisis of social media.

{To be continued In-sha-Allāh (If Allāh Wills)...}

"And keep reminding, because reminding benefits the believers." (Qur-ān 51:55)