Skip to main content

Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage* *Episode 183* _*A DIVORCED SINGLE MOTHER WROTE

*Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage*

*Episode 183*

_*A DIVORCED SINGLE MOTHER WROTE*_

I am writing to you in order to make someone understand that it's good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.

I am 32 years of age. 

My ex husband and I dated for 6 years.

We where best of friends.

I waited until he completed college and started work.

My family and his family then met.

We got married and had a son. (7 years old now).

My husband was short tempered at times but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he couldn't control me.

Every time we argued, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain.

My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him.

If he was controlling me I would always dare him that if he wished, he could divorce me.

I never wanted divorce.

I just had pride and I never wanted to look like a loose woman in his eyes.

One day I pushed him so hard that for the first time he beat me and locked me outside.

I went to my family, my family took him to the police, every time I looked like I was being abused!

But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.

He was arrested and detained.

I was asked by his family to withdraw the case.

I felt that what I was doing was wrong.

My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall of which he openly knelt down and apologized.

I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.

After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue and he remained alone.

After two days, I
received a call that he was in the hospital.

My family told me that I shouldn't go there because it would look like I was begging him and my sisters believed he was feigning the illness.

All this time, people felt sorry for me like I was the one being abused.

He spent a week in the hospital, after he came out, I just received a divorce summon.

I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me.

I called him and said he would get the divorce because I lived like I was in hell.

When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared.

To my surprise he openly told the court that whatever he and I acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.

We were divorced in 2009 July.

Now, my husband is married, whilst l am here wasted!

My family members are gossiping about me.

I depend on what my ex husband gives to my son for survival.

I know I wasted my
marriage.

I am here telling all wives that they should be careful how they get advise.

Don't be cheated, don't entertain family interference in your marriage my dear reader.

Even my young sisters are much more respected than me.

Those who encouraged me to get divorced are always teasing and bad mouthing me.

Please ladies, be vigilant in your marriage.

Thought it wise to share my story to save your marriage.

There is no benefit in pride for nothing.

SOMETIMES IT'S NOT THE MAN'S FAULT AT ALL, IT'S YOUR PRIDE,AND THE PEOPLE YOU ALLOWED TO ADVISE YOU,SO BE WISE AND VIGILANT IN YOUR MARRIAGE.


{To be continued In-sha-Allāh (If Allāh Wills)...}


"And keep reminding, because reminding benefits the believers." (Qur-ān 51:55)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

GIVE CHARITY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD

 DAILY ISLAMIC REMINDERS. Yawm Ath-thalaatha. 28th day of Shaw'waal, 1445AH (Tuesday 7th May 2024). *_GIVE CHARITY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD_*. Aameen.  Narrated Abu Hurairah [radhi-yAllahu 'anhu]: The Prophet (SallallahuAlaihiWasallam) said, "Charity is obligatory everyday on every joint of a human being.* If one helps a person in matters concerning his riding animal by helping him to ride on it or by lifting his luggage on to it, all these will be regarded as charity. A good word, and every step one takes to offer the compulsory congregational prayer is regarded as charity; and guiding somebody on the road is regarded as charity." [Sahih Al-Bukhari, 4/2891]. To show gratitude to ALLAH for keeping your body safe and sound, you should give in charity or do charitable deeds. Narrated Abu Hurairah [radhi-yAllahu 'anhu]: ALLAH'S Messenger (sallallahuAlaihiWasallam) said, "The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one w

ISTIKHĀRA: HOW & WHY

Istikhāra (Seeking Goodness) : To seek blessings & guidance from Allāh ﷻ for a decision 1Make Intention for Istikhāra 2Pray 2 Rakaʿāt of Prayer 3Recite the duʿāʾ of istikhāra and mention your need Duʿāʾ al-Istikhāra اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْتَخِيرُكَ بِعِلْمِكَ وَأَسْتَقْدِرُكَ بِقُدْرَتِكَ، وَأَسْأَلُكَ مِنْ فَضْلِكَ الْعَظِيمِ، فَإِنَّكَ تَقْدِرُ وَلاَ أَقْدِرُ وَتَعْلَمُ وَلاَ أَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتَ عَلاَّمُ الْغُيُوبِ، اللَّهُمَّ إِنْ كُنْتَ تَعْلَمُ أَنَّ هَذَاالأَمْرَ ‭[mention decision here]‬ خَيْرٌ لِي فِي دِينِي وَمَعَاشِي وَعَاقِبَةِ أَمْرِي فَاقْدُرْهُ لِي وَيَسِّرْهُ لِي ثُمَّ بَارِكْ لِي فِيهِ، وَإِنْ كُنْتَ تَعْلَمُ أَنَّ هَذَا الأَمْرَ شَرٌّ لِي فِي دِينِي وَمَعَاشِي وَعَاقِبَةِ أَمْرِي فَاصْرِفْهُ عَنِّي وَاصْرِفْنِي عَنْهُ، وَاقْدُرْ لِي الْخَيْرَ حَيْثُ كَانَ ثُمَّ أَرْضِنِي بِهِ Transliteration / Audio English Translation Dear God, I’m asking You for goodness through Your [Infinite] Knowledge, and I’m asking You for strength through Your Divine Ability, an

NOTHING HAPPENS WITHOUT THE PERMISSION OF ALLAH

 DAILY ISLAMIC REMINDERS. Yawm Arba'a. 29th day of Shaw'waal, 1445AH (Wednesday 8th May 2024). *_NOTHING HAPPENS WITHOUT THE PERMISSION OF ALLAH_*. BismilLah.  Even though feelings of Panic, stress/worries etc are part of life, they must not reduce our acts of worship or trust in ALLAH. The more a man turns to ALLAH and focuses on HIM, the more he will feel a sense of peace and comfort, to an extent that no one knows except ALLAH. Hence those who know ALLAH, are close to HIM and fear HIM are the happiest of people, to such an extent that one of them said, in a well-known expression: “If the kings and the sons of kings knew what joy we have, they would fight us for it with the sword.” This is also what is expressed in the Qur’an, as ALLAH says: “Whoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him ALLAH will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and ALLAH will p