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Guidelines To Intimacy In Islam
Episode 20
Beautification
A key part of preparing for sexual relations is to ensure that the wife beautifies herself for her husband. Human beings are highly visual creatures that enjoy seeing and experiencing things that are beautiful.
This is why Islam encourages its adherents to adorn themselves whenever they attend public gatherings such as the Jumu'ah and 'Eid Salaahs. If Muslims are asked to appear pleasant in front of people whom they do not even know, then how much more should they not adorn themselves for people whom they know.
As such, the importance of a wife adorning herself in preparation for sexual relations with her husband cannot be overstated. Allaah Ta’aala describes the maidens of Jannah known as "Hurul-'ayn" or ''wide-eyed virgins", by saying:'They will look like rubies and corals." (Qur'an 55:58)
This indicates that adornment is a means of attracting the attention of one's spouse. A wife who is desirous of a healthy sexual relationship, and by extension a healthy marriage, should endeavour to beautify herself for her husband. In this way, the husband will also be saved from casting lustful glances at other women.
Unfortunately, some Muslims consider that it is inappropriate for a practicing Muslim woman to adorn herself in a captivating manner for her husband. This is far from the truth. Not only is it permissible for a woman to use the various
means of beautification for her husband, but rather she is rewarded for doing so.
Rasulullaah صلى الله عليه وسلم also encouraged women to adorn themselves and maintain a good appearance for their husbands.
Sayyida 'A'isha relates, "A woman from behind a curtain made a gesture to indicate that she had a letter for Rasulullaah صلى الله عليه وسلم) . She put only her hand through the curtain.) Rasulullaah صلى الله عليه وسلم withdrew his hand and said, "I do not know if this is a man's or a woman's hand." She said, "It is the hand of a woman." He صلى الله عليه وسلم said,
"If you were a woman, you would have made changes to your nails, meaning with
Henna." (Sunan Abu Dawud 4163)
The wife's beautification, therefore, contributes to a healthy sexual relationship, and is a key element of the physical preparation for sexual relations.
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