Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage Episode 273 GETTING MARRIED (part 2)

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*Let's Change Our Mindsets About Marriage*

*Episode 273*

*GETTING MARRIED (part 2)*

You could go into a most beautiful garden and be amazed at the profusion and lushness of the flowers, the neatness of the borders and grasses, the absence of marauding insects and pests-and you would never for a moment think that this had come about by accident. You would know, straight away, that the garden had been 

created by a person or team of people who loved gardening, and no matter what the setbacks and problems were determined to produce a thing of great beauty and joy. 

A marriage is cultivated in exactly the same way. 

You have to be able to see in your mind's eye the sort of garden/marriage you would like to have when it is finished, and aim towards it. If events turn out slightly differently to what you expected, it does not matter all that much, because your master plan will be there to keep you heading in the right direction, and all unexpected events will simply be incorporated into moving towards this plan. 

Carrying on with the garden imagery, you have to be able to recognise the seeds that you are planting, and weed out the plants you don't want before they cause trouble. Some seeds develop into beautiful flowers, while others are troublesome weeds-like bindweed, which climbs over everything else and chokes it, until the garden is buried and destroyed.

 

You have to be on the alert for invasions of malicious pests which, although they are 

themselves claiming a right to live, are nevertheless gaining their living at the expense of yours, and are ruining the things you have planted. 

You have to keep an eye on the weather, and when there is not enough rainfall, you must do the long chore of going round the garden yourself carrying water, making sure everything is all right. In a long, dry spell, is might mean a great deal of drudgery-but you know at without it your garden will fail and die. It is up to you keep everything going. 

All devout Muslims, men and women, should remember this fact, in case they think that 

in marriage God has granted them something in which they can just lounge about and 'watch the flowers grow'. God never grants human beings this privilege. Whatever they have that 

gives them pleasure, they have to work for it-they really have to earn the right to be its steward.

 

Everything in life is a gift, and does not belong as of right to any person. Even your body is a gift, enjoyed (or not enjoyed!) by your soul for the duration of its sojourn on earth. 

It is not there as a permanent feature of the universe; in fact, there are no permanent 

features of the universe-not even the rocks from which the great mountains are formed! 

God has made us stewards, the khulafa; the guardians of this wondrous planet and its 

life-forms. And the most important life form that we will ever have to cherish is our own 

partner, our husband or wife. From that person, we are intended to produce in love the 

Muslims of the next generation, and set them on their own ways with our examples and 

encouragement. With that person, we are supposed to build up our own lives, free from 

fears and resentments and uncertainties, so that we can concentrate on filling our 'space' with love and the service of God. 

This is why marriage is 'half the religion.' Islam is intended to cover every aspect of a believer's life, twenty four hours per day. Our relationship with our life-partner and family certainly accounts for at least half of this time, and for some women, it occupies one hundred percent of their time.