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RESTRAINING THE TONGUE

*RESTRAINING THE TONGUE*

*"(Remember) when you sought help of your Lord and He answered you...* [Qur'an 8:9]

The historians Narrate that one day Khalid Ibn Yazīd Ibn Mu'āwiyyah slandered 'Abdullāh Ibn az-Zubayr, the sworn enemy of Bani Umayyah, and said that he was a miser. His wife Ramlah bint az-Zubayr, the sister of 'Abdullāh, was sitting there, but she kept quiet and did not say a word. Khalid said to her: "Why don't you say anything? Do you agree with what I said, or is it just that you do not want to answer me?" She said: "Neither. But a woman was created as interfere in the affairs of men, rather we are flowers for smelling and embracing. Why would we want to interfere in your affairs?" He was impressed with her words and kissed her between the eyes.

The Messenger of Allāh (Blessings and Peace be upon him) emphatically forbade spreading the secrets of the marital relationship. Ahmad Ibn Hanbal narrated that Asmā' bint Yazīd said that she was with the prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) and men and the were sitting there, and he said: *"Perhaps a man says what he does with his wife, or perhaps a woman says what she does with her husband." The people kept quiet and did not respond. I said: "O' Messenger of Allāh, they do indeed do that." He said: "Do not do that, for that is as if a male devil met a female devil in the street and had intercourse with her whilst the people were looking on."*

Some Mufassirīn (commentators) interpret the word hāfīzāt [(women) who guard] in the verse,

*"... Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allāh and to their husbands), and guard in [the husband's] absence what Allāh orders them to guard..."* [Qur'an 4:34]

_as referring to women who guard (keep secret) what happens between them and their husbands.

*"Count Allāh's blessings upon you, not your problems."*

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