Ummu Salamah* [[ Part 1-of-2 ]]

 *Ummu Salamah*

[[ Part 1-of-2 ]]
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بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Umm Salamah (r.a), because of her beauty, knowledge and wisdom held an eminent position.

The Prophet (pbuh) once ordered his Companions to sacrifice the animals they brought along for the purpose, and shave their heads. But they all seemed reluctant and did not rise to obey his command. When Umm Salamah saw the situation, she suggested that he (the Prophet) should not speak about the subject to anyone, but just go out from the tent and offer the sacrifice and shave his head. Then he could see the effect of his action. And what she expected happened - all the Companions followed suit.

*Lessons:*

It pays been a supportive spouse

In most cases, our first year of marriage used to be tough because of the marriage adjustments we had to make, with each other, and to married life. Plus, we had a lot of other tough life challenges happen that were mostly out of our control.

Life presented us with some choices to make, cling together, support each other, learn how to work together, or we could fight and fall apart.

What's support?

Support means furnishing encouragement; providing for or maintaining; bearing the weight of.

Marriage can be called supportive one if the spouses does it: 1) Financially; 2) Verbally especially through giving each other good advice; 3) Edify the spouse in public and private; 4) Listen to, and respect each other's opinions...etc.

In the case of Umm Salamah *(as stated above)*, she helped her husband using one POWERFUL METHODOLOGY of teaching and learning - that's "Learning By Example"

My People!

Learning by doing is the idea that we make people learn more when we actually “do” the activity.

Now,

*Kind advice to parents:*

Always remember the golden rule of parenting when it comes to your children: Children do as they see, not as you say. Therefore, if you want to change ur family and make the children to be righteous, then, start with yourself and make an active intention in your heart to be the best role model.

It is the right of every Muslim child that his parents are of good examples. Religiosity and character plays a major role in the bringing up of righteous children. Yes. One cannot get away by telling children to do some things while we ourselves don’t do it😃. Yes. Allah (swt) say:
                                أَتَأْمُرُونَ النَّاسَ بِالْبِرِّ وَتَنسَوْنَ أَنفُسَكُمْ

Don't enjoin Al-Birr (ie - piety and righteousness and every act of obedience to Allah) on the people and you yourself don't practise it. 📚Q 2:44

The saying *“Do as I say and not as I do”* does not apply. Yes, the children may be forced on that basis, but they will not learn and adapt to righteousness that way, instead they will turn into hypocrites😃; they will do it only because they have been told to do it. If for example the mother is modest and shy, wears hijab, pray ontime, is gentle, then, the children will authentically act that way BUT if she yells, don't pray ontime, they will do the same.. If the mother backbites, slanders or lies, so will the children. Often parents teach the children how to lie😃. For example, if someone calls the house and they don’t want to talk to the caller, they say, *“Tell the person I am not here.”* They have just taught their child how to lie. The mum might tell the children to hide things from their father, and that also teaches them how to lie.

To be continued