Remarrying Issue* [[---- Part 3 ----]]

 *Remarrying Issue*

[[---- Part 3 ----]]
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بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

I want to advise all the single men and already married men to try marrying divorced Woman or widow.. They are so good & experienced.. And statistics results have revealed that 80% of divorced Women are not that bad but a victim of circumstances. Moreover, "Mistakes" are the best teacher. Yes. Every relationship, good or bad, teaches us too many lessons in life which helps nurture our future relationships.

Besides,

Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) got married to 11 ladies all of them have previously married with the exception of Aishah (ra).

Now,

Continuation of the previous episodes - as promised:

*Rules for a Successful Remarriage:*

*Number 3:*

Acknowledge your role in your first divorce. This will help you to avoid another divorce.

How?

Allah (swt) is not happy to see institution like marriage crashing. Yes. This is true because 70% of divorce today occured due to the parts played by both spouses. In most cases, both parties shared the blame, and in the end, suffer the consequences. Evidence:

وَمَآ أَصَٰبَكُم مِّن مُّصِيبَةٍ فَبِمَا كَسَبَتْ أَيْدِيكُمْ ...."

"And whatever strikes you of disaster -  it is for what your hands have earned;..". 📚Ash-Shura 42:30

Therefore,

Acknowledge your role in your first divorce. This is the single most important thing you can do to avoid a another divorce. Yes  Identifying and understanding how your own actions which may have contributed to your first divorce, can help you avoid falling into the same patterns during your new marriage.

*Number 4:*

Divorce Baggage

When people get remarried, they often bring unhealthy relationship patterns and trust issues from their first marriage that can sabotage the new relationship. Yes. Having been through a wrenching emotional experience, one might be wary of fully opening their heart to a new love.

Someone may think they are over their divorce, but deep down, at the subconscious level, their wounds are still raw😃. For instance, if you were betrayed by your former spouse, you may be overly suspicious and lack confidence in your new partner.

Carrying the same emotional baggage and pain from one relationship to another is poisonous. As Muslims, we have a head start on the process of letting go because we know, in theory if not in reality, that letting go means submitting to the Will of Allah (swt). Yes. Muslims know that Allah has control over all things. When a leaf falls from a tree it has done so by the permission and the Will of Allah. When the branch bends into the wind and thus survives a storm, it does so because Allah (swt) has decreed that it will live on.

Evidence:

"And with Him are the keys of the unseen; none knows them except Him. And He knows what is on the land and in the sea. Not a leaf falls but that He knows it. And no grain is there within the darknesses of the earth and no moist or dry [thing] but that it is [written] in a clear record". 📚Al-An'am 6:59

For these reasons,

I'm advising that you let go of what happened in the past if you are going into the new marriage. Be emotionally healed, and healthy, and really ready for a fresh start.

To be continued...