Buy Enough Time* [[-- 5th Show --]]

 *Buy Enough Time*

[[-- 5th Show --]]
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بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

This remind me of some people's testimonies which will help in doing justice to this topic:

*Testimony No 3:*

Mr Usman narrated: "The time i married my wife newly, i noticed she was (1) very weak and lazy when it comes to house work especially the cleanliness aspects of the house work; (2) she don't have waking up for midnight nawafil/Tahajjud in her dictionary... As a newly wedded couple, i thought it is something i can change within 2weeks or one month. I started with talking to her politely about her shortfalls in house work, there was no positive results. I changed face when talking to her about it but no positive results. I tried helping her in this regard, thinking that she will be guilty seeing me doing her duties but no positive results. We used to quarrelled sometimes over this, but the change i saw in this regard was not significant. About the Tahajjud prayer issue, i admonished, advice and sometimes quarrelled but no positive results. In fact, sometimes in the middle of the night, i used to go forceful with her that, *"if she can not get up to pray, then, she must remain seated watching me (not sleeping) until I'm done before she lay down"*. All these could not yield a better fruit. I got tired and fed up.. I started putting her matters in to my Du'a, while i continued talking to her about it time to time (patiently) using wisdom. Gradually, she started changing positively. To cut the long story short, in terms of house work, i can grade her 75% now as against 10% when i married her.. About Tahajjud, as soon as my phone alarm clock ring, she wakes up too (without waking her up). I'm surprised to see her now, waking up for midnight nawafil on her own.. Our marriage will be clicking 5years in the next few months.. Alhamdulillah!!! She have changed all the undesirable behaviors in her".

My People!

Sure!!! Your spouse will also change all his or her undesirable behaviors, but you need to give it time. Yes. You need efforts (good communication, Du'a making and patient) to succeed in achieving this.

Do not feel disappointed in your marriage. After all, every couple have their own unique marital problems. And Allah (swt) did not make any mistake joining the two of you. Yes. He (Allah) wanted you to earn rewards by changing your spouse's undesirable behaviors to a desirable one.

Since marriage is an act of worship, every spouse is expected to be the Dr ZAKIR NAIK in his or her family. Yes. Every Muslim should be a daa’iyah (propagator)who calls people to way of Allah. Yes. Allah (swt) instructed our beloved Prophet (pbuh) and all of us thus:

Evidence:

وَأَنذِرْ عَشِيرَتَكَ ٱلْأَقْرَبِينَ

"And warn, [O Muhammad], your closest kindred." 📚Ash-Shu'ara' 26:214

Now,

*How To Handle A Difficult Husband Or Wife When it Comes to Change:*

Continuation of the previous episodes - as promised.

*Tip No 1:* Effective Communication

Good communication is key to any healthy relationship. You need to create an environment where both of you can openly discuss anything and everything about the relationship, whether it is the anger patterns, the hurtful words used, or any negative behavior that bothers you.. In the cause of doing this, what you need is wisdom to change your spouse's undesirable behaviors and not this quarrel/fighting formula, because....

To be continued