THE BEAUTY OF GRATITUDE IN MARRIAGE

 FAJR REMINDER: THE BEAUTY OF GRATITUDE IN MARRIAGE

By: Umm Affān

Muḥarram 17, 1448 (2-July-2026)

Have you ever reflected on why the Messenger of Allāh (ﷺ) informed us that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-Fire are women? It is a question that deserves sincere contemplation—not to discourage or frighten women, but to remind us of a habit that can have enormous consequences in this life and the next: ingratitude.

Gratitude is one of the finest qualities a believer can possess. It reflects humility, sincerity, and recognition of the blessings Allāh has placed in our lives. A grateful heart appreciates both the Giver of blessings and the means through which those blessings arrive.

Ibn ‘Abbās (Raḍiyallāhu ‘Anhuma) reported: The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “I was shown the Hell-Fire and the majority of its dwellers were ungrateful women. It was asked, ‘Do they disbelieve in Allāh?’ (Or are they ungrateful to Allāh?) He replied, ‘They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them.’ If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, ‘I have never received any good from you.’” [Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 29]

This Ḥadīth should cause every married woman to pause and examine her heart. Do I acknowledge my husband's efforts? Do I express appreciation when he sacrifices for our family? Or have I become so accustomed to his kindness that I hardly notice it anymore?

A husband is indeed responsible for providing and caring for his family. However, fulfilling a responsibility does not make appreciation unnecessary. Countless men neglect their wives and children, leaving them emotionally, financially, and spiritually abandoned. When Allāh blesses a woman with a husband who strives to fulfil his duties, she should recognize that blessing and thank both Allāh and her husband.

Many husbands are not simply paying bills or meeting obligations. They are trying to communicate love through their actions. They work long hours, endure stress, set aside their personal needs, and make sacrifices so that their families can live comfortably. Sometimes, all they hope to hear is a sincere, “Thank you.” Tell him, “I feel taken care of because of you.” If he is a devoted father, tell him, “Our kids are fortunate to have you as their dad.” Such words may seem small, but they can renew a husband's strength and inspire him to become an even better husband and father.

Just as the righteous will be honoured in the Hereafter with words of peace and appreciation for their patience and obedience, appreciation should also exist within our homes. A few sincere words can strengthen a marriage more than we often realize.

‘Abdullāh Ibn ‘Amr reported: The Messenger of Allāh (ﷺ) said, “Allāh will not look at a woman who is ungrateful to her husband while she cannot take care of herself without him.” [al-Sunan al-Kubrá lil-Nasā’ī 9086]

A righteous husband is among the priceless gifts that Allāh bestows upon His servants. Some women cry to Allāh every night asking for a righteous spouse. There are women whose youth has passed without receiving a suitable proposal. Others entered marriages only to experience hardship, neglect, or abuse. If Allāh has blessed you with a husband who fears Him, honours you, provides for you, and sincerely tries to fulfil your rights, then treasure that blessing. Do not let familiarity make you forget its value. Blessings that go unappreciated are often taken for granted.

Dear sisters, gratitude is not merely good manners—it is an act of worship. It nurtures love, strengthens trust, and fills the home with Barakah. Men naturally appreciate being respected, thanked, encouraged, and remembered in the Du‘ā‘ of their wives. A wife's sincere supplication for her husband is one of the greatest gifts she can offer him. Pray for his guidance, protection, provision, good health, steadfastness upon the truth, and success in both this world and the Hereafter. By the Permission of Allāh, such prayers will return goodness to the entire family.

I beseech Allāh (ﷻ) to make us among those who are grateful to Him in every circumstance, appreciative of those through whom He sends His Blessings, and among the people whose homes are filled with mercy, tranquillity, love, and Barakah. Aameen